Musings number I-lost-count
I'm beginning to see a weird pattern to my blogging style. Ok not really pattern, more like timing? Every month, there's a time when I just get in the mood to blog, or really it's probably me realizing that I neglect my blog too much and out of some weird obligation I try to blog once in awhile.
It's amazing when you think about it, this blog has been up for years and yet I haven't even posted more than 100 times (this is the 98th post). Looking back, you can't help but wonder what you really did with your time. Sometimes it feels as if I've gone through 24 years of living without really doing anything; not having any major accomplishments in life affects you that way, probably. Time, time, time; you hear me talking about it all the time (no pun intended). After awhile, people start to think I'm some old geezer in a young adult's body.
I recall the days when I was a gamer in a private dota server and all the net friends I've made, some of whom are my close friends in real life today. I can only marvel at it. Years ago, my parents once asked me what's so fun about chatting online with people I've never met and might never meet in real life. I couldn't really answer it then but to me, it just felt great to make friends online you can connect with despite never meeting. Of course, it came a time when we did meet up, and the rest is history. I've known EdeNz (or Sau Ken, for some reason I still call him Edenz, though he calls me by name) for years, since the early days when we were both dota freaks. Discussing tactics and strategies were all we did, along with all the other nonsense we cook up now and then. Today, he's dating a girl who was also a gamer we got to know during our time there. I dare you to tell me "it's not possible to make friends through the Internet". In case you are wondering, they've been steady for what? 3 years or so?
Lots of things have been happening in the office, many of it bad. One of the things time has hopefully done for me (I'm not so sure though) is that I have toned down on many things. I still have a temper, but I don't blow up anymore and I try to be as careful with my words as I can, though I never know if I may have offended anyone. I'm still emo, whiney at times and complain a lot. But I clearly know when to put a stop to it and even if I don't, it seems there will be 1-2 people who will smack me on the head when I have to stop; friends like that are way better than the ones who are hypocrites and always tell you that it's "alright".
Well, the fact doesn't change that I'm a geeky kinda guy with bad social skills and I still don't have a girlfriend. When it comes to this, I dunno whether I should feel chagrined or just shake my head and continue to way I am; if I pick the latter, chances are my mum's not gonna have any grandchildren till my brother decides to make one for her (crude as that may sound).
Part of what I've really been thinking for awhile now is: where do I go from here? I've whined about my work condition, you've heard it and are probably sick of it. But it's kinda like the Strea- I mean Shitmyx situation. You wanna get out, but it is currently the best of the worst. It's still bad, gives you migraines, and makes you wanna invent new swear words other than the proverbial variation of the F word, but in the end it's the best of the lot. Oh, the irony. *puts hand to forehead and feigns dizziness*
Drama aside, I've been replaying the FSN visual novel from the beginning again now that I managed to add the Realta Nua voice patch to it. Having voice added in is a real bonus and really adds a new dimension to the experience. Love Ueda Kana's voice as usual, and Sugiyama Noriaki is uber GAR (yes, even more so than GARcher). Now if only certain scenes had voice added in as well. :P *wink wink*
Now that I've done my somewhat-obligated-monthly-post, I'll continue on my journey in the world of Fate Stay/Night. :3 Abayo~