Who needs a title? -_-'

"Growing up is a pain!" is probably something you've heard many people exclaim before, one time too many. Admittedly I've gradually grown up these past few years exclaiming that line quite a few times myself. Heck, I still do sometimes, am still whiny about how tough life can be, and overall grew up to be...rather cynical at times.

People seem to take things at face value, something I've used to my advantage these few years. Put on a mask and a persona to fool the world, and they might just glance right over you; makes things easier. That is not to say that other people are not the same, in fact I'm more inclined to believe that almost everyone puts on a mask of their own. Some friends who are closer to me in recent years (my school friends haven't really mix with me much since..graduation from school) would call me two-faced; of course, they are refering to my behaviour. Makes me feel like Kallen from Code Geass season 1 though, I think I picked a persona that is too weak so much so that people get the impression that I'm easy to bully. However, that's definitely not the case and it's more like I don't want to retaliate. Some of my long time friends probably know of my explosive temper when I was younger. I haven't really had anything trigger any explosions lately, something I'd like to attribute to my growing control over my emotions. I'd like to think so really, but maybe it's not really that. I dunno.

What's the point of this post you ask? If you've been reading my posts, you should know by now that more than half the time... I never make any sense. Anyway, growing up is still a pain. I find so many defects with myself physically and mentally (shit I'm gaining weight where I don't want them to...), makes me wonder if I'll ever snag myself a girlfriend; probably not. "Time flies!" eventually becomes so cliche you don't even bother spouting that line anymore, and you get to tell younger people that you "ate more salt than you ever did rice!" Neglecting the fact that salt is pretty widely used in a number of dishes. "Come back again after you have eaten more celery than rice" is what I'll tell you if you say that line to my face.

Go into the office early in the month and you find your boss already chasing you for articles and stuff certainly makes if quite certain that it's going to be a tough and shitty month. Nevermind that we're suppose to have a company trip soon.... >_> Speaking of company trip, I kept telling my friend that I'll make my move during the company trip. What move? You don't need to know. Anyway I'm still not quite sure if it's safe to make a move yet. Too hasty and I might just mess things up.

I think I'm thinking too much. Wait scratch that...I KNOW I think too much and it's actually very much in my nature to think too much, but still not be able to predict and figure out everything. Wish I was born a genius or something, would have made life hella easier. Tough month+uncertainties+growing pains=definitely very melancholic day for me.